The dreadful occasion is around the corner. Valentines Day.
As my hatred of love slowly consumes my soul, I watch the hand-holding couples line the street. Valentines Day is such a wonderful an exciting day of couples, for you spend the night with your loved one in a romantic setting…meanwhile I sit alone in my apartment bitter, and drinking a bottle of wine. In Despite the hundreds of heart shaped candy lining the walls of every store, Valentines day is quite a nuisance in terms of having the whole consumerisim of Hallmark shoved down your throat.
Valentines Day is seriously a buzzkill for most single people, for the only thing of utter importance is the over stock of chocolate in every store. Before you go ahead and buy yourself 8 boxed of over priced candy, you must learn the golden rule: Buy your chocolate on February 15th, for all the heart shaped pukeage is on sale.
This Valentines Day will be much different than the rest, for I will be hosting the first annual Violentines Day party. Being single on Valentines Day offers me the opportunity to host an anti-Valentines day party with 20 of my closest friends to ring in the holiday with a shit ton of hatred. The only rule of my party: You must wear black.
For once in my life I am actually looking forward to Valentines Day! Of course I am still spending it alone and single, but at least I will be spending it having drunken fun with friends.
This Valentines Day, do not fret about being single and miserable. Use this day as a chance to have fun with your friends, and eat as much as you want. Valentines Day is no longer a day for couples, it is a day for you. It is a day for you to unleash your hatred of love onto the world, and have a drunken good time you will remember!
If you host a Violentines day party, make sure to tell me about it!