Packing up all of my belongings and moving out grew to be an incredibly difficult. Looking around my barren apartment, the flat feels quite vacant yet filled to the walls with a multitude of memories. Carrying the last of my belongings to a waiting car, I am driven out of the parking garage thinking about all that I was leaving behind. Coming into the city I was helpless, broken and in search of an escape. Now that I am leaving the condo that housed me for my time in the city, I can’t help but feel quite despaired. Staring out the window at the cars passing me along the highway, I take the long road back to my suburban family home. I can’t help but think about how much I am going to miss the city.
With Witt back in her hometown, and Nat working hard at her summer job, I honestly do not know what to do with myself back here. Over the past few hours, I have been consumed with boredom. I have taken a walk, watched four episodes of Gossip Girl, and now I am vegetating over a bowl of chocolate. Suburbia honestly is the epitome of excitement…please note my sarcasm. Well since I am surrounded with some new scenery, I guess it is now time to introduce you all to some old characters from the narrative of my life. Soon I will be reconnected with people that I never thought I would have to see again. I thought the city was filled with drama, but the city has nothing on the drama created in such a small suburban community. I am honestly frightened to be reconnected with the people of my past, for I am definitely not the same person as I was in high school, or even the person I was at the beginning of the year. I feel a merge coming on, and I am not sure if I know how to react to it all.
I think that the biggest thing I am worried about is the idea of acceptance, for in the city nothing is considered abnormal, yet here acceptance is sometimes difficult to find.
It is quite odd to walk down the street here for there is so much room, and an utter lack of people pushing and shoving. Now that I have all my clothing back in my original closet, I am attempting to dress myself to meet Raquel this evening. Will we find ourselves at a coffee shop, or a local bar? Who knows, for there is really not much else to do here.
This summer will be a change much different than any I have experienced so far. Living with my family for four months will not only be long, but it will also present the challenge of hiding this new me. Currently sans septum piercing and an utter lack of black in my wardrobe, I have already put my new self into hiding as I spend the weekend with the family.
Where will this summer take me? who knows, but as long as I have a bottle of wine in hand and friends by my side, I can conquer all.